In an additional sign of my pathetic wretchedness, I have been declined by eHarmony. Based upon the questions, I am fairly certain it's because I am not intolerant enough for Dr. Neil Clark Warren. There were lots of questions along the lines of "How important is it that your mate be of the same religion as you?"UPDATE: A reader has discovered the problem. (Probably NSFW.)
12 comments:
Ouch. My suggestion would be to think less and start watching "The View".
I assume eHarmony's matching software pretty much matches you with someone of the same race, religion, numerical desire for children, and some kind of physical score (probably the girls in the office assigning a number grade).
Certainly, this has to be a badge of honor.
Just let us know your target market - age, type, etc - Lou and see if your mini-following here can hook you up!
Unit size would be useful as well, for the discriminating tastes only.
I was also turned down about 6 years ago. One month later, I met the woman who is now my wife via Yahoo Personals. I noticed eHarmony still claims they cannot match 1 out of every 5 applicants. My suspicion is that the number is much higher. They just don't want to advertise what it really is.
Irregardless, if I had known the rejection rate was that high, I wouldn't have spent the time filling out the long questionnaire. If I remember correctly, it took about 30 minutes to fill out (if you actually took your time and answered truthfully).
Doug wrote: Irregardless
I'm having trouble "matching" that word to a dictionary entry! ;-)
Thats cuz your a looser. Dont be trippin, yo!
Don't sweat it. From what I've heard it takes a couple of weeks for a match to be found. You won't get a hit right out of the gate. Maybe you need to love cats, get a tat, and tandem skydive at least once.
Anon, maybe I should go to Mexico and swim with a dolphin.
Sorry... that's what I get for posting too quickly..
I should've made clear, that comment was meant towards the grammar Nazi
eHarmony has twice told me to take a hike. Don't feel bad about it. They set things up so they can brag about their great success rate by dropping anyone who even shows the slightest sign of an original thought
I'm having trouble "matching" that word to a dictionary entry! ;-)
And I'm having trouble seeing how an exclamation point belongs at the end of your sentence.
Hey, me too !
"There are currently no matches in communication"
Communication? Oh never mind. No matches, even though I lied outrageously to make myself a very eligible fifty-something widower.
I reckon their matching software is just up shit creek.
Oh, and they say I am best described as:
CONSISTENTLY TAKING CARE OF YOURSELF
Words that describe you:
* Uncompromising
* Frank
* Astute
* Critical
* Empirical
* Tough
* Discerning
* Sceptical
* Shrewd
Next time I'll be a mentally retarded one-legged albino negro with AIDS, maybe that'll stir up some feminine compassion and they'll find me a match :wink:
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